One Is a Lonely Number

The days are long, but the nights are longer

image by public domain archive from pixabay

Today I am alone.

Tomorrow I will be alone.

And probably for the rest of my life I will be alone.

My husband has passed away. I can’t believe I am writing these words.

I feel like I am living someone else’s life.

He collapsed in front of me as we were walking to the car. He fell onto the path that I must take to get to my car. So, every time I go out I must walk this same path. The mental picture of him lying there will stay with me forever.

This nightmare plays over and over in my mind.

I am torn apart, raw inside. Can’t eat and barely sleep. Consumed by fear of the future. Trying to breathe and put one foot in front of the other.

My best companion and life partner of 43 years is gone forever.

Gone is his smile and laughter. His warmth and love. How do I live without him?

Now there is no one to talk to, no one to have coffee with or cook for.

The house is hauntingly quiet. Only my footsteps can be heard.

So many familiar sounds are gone forever.

We all handle grief in our own special way. There is no timetable to tell you how long you will feel…